Motherhood is the best phase for any woman, and the motherly instinct is instilled from the very beginning of this phase, which is the baby’s conception.
As soon as you know that you are pregnant and, in a few months, your life will move around him, you also start wondering how you can render the best to the little one.
Indeed, planning is good, but sometimes we as women forget that perfection is not real. Life is about imperfection and endeavoring to keep going ahead with the right instincts.
Characteristics of a Good Mother
So, what makes a good mom? Look closer at this listing of the top characteristics of a good mother.
Patient
You will not shout or say things that will later on be regretted if you are patient. A lot is meant by the working mom, especially in the morning when one is always running out of time but everything in the house has to be attended to. It is being a patient mom that is important in motherhood.
Respectful
It’s so easy to treat our children disrespectfully, rudely, or in any other way we would not like others to treat them. So why do we do it? Treat your child as the person he really is, not just as an image of yourself. He is a great, independent individual who is developing his personality, tastes, likes and dislikes, as well as needs and goals of his own. You will so often disagree and argue with him about your beliefs and opinions, though in these situations, you should always respect him.
Humble
We shouldn’t pretend to be perfect, for we are not.
Nothing can be worse if you let your pride overrun you. Children need to know that even adults are human. How many times have you tried to hide something from your children because you were embarrassed by what you had done?
If you never accept responsibility for your mistakes, how do you expect them to? Take the opportunity to apologise on their behalf, however small, just in order to teach them how to apologise to other people.
Discover the 21 Secrets Tips on Being a Good Mother
Nurturing a child is a constant process, and it is complicated! Therefore, we must aim to develop a positive relationship with our children. Today we will uncover all the must-know secrets for new, old, or would-be mothers who wish to know how to be a good mother.
Also read: Lululemon Diaper Bag Choices for Active Parents
1. Always be patient with your child.
Patience is the most important thing in parenting. It may sound simple, but exercising this trait is a challenge many mothers fail at some point. For example, not reacting to a child crying and being stubborn about something is difficult. But if you get irritated and react incorrectly, you may regret it later.
Thus, you need to work on your patience and try calming down the kid by making him understand his mistakes. If you get angry with your child, he may get quiet then, but that anger would convey a wrong message to him.
It is important to know that a crying child is already trying to manage his emotions. If you get harsh, he may have a hard time as you are putting even more pressure on him.
2. Maintain a routine
As a good mother, try maintaining a routine for your child, no matter his age. The earlier you start practicing this, the better results you achieve. Remember, your child learns from you, and it is believed that a kid inculcates traits he sees around him.
You better be a good role model. So, as a parent, if you are following a routine for yourself and your little one, he will eventually start following the same from his childhood with the least effort.
So, this aspect plays a crucial role in child development and reflects in the later stage of their life. Motherhood teaches the right habits and makes the child follow them at the right time.
Also read: 10 Signs Your Toddler is Not Ready for a Bed
3. Always listen to your child.
Mothers should spend quality time with their children where they listen to their perspectives on life. This is crucial if your child goes to school since it will help you understand what they are learning and observing.
A healthy interaction indicates the mother’s love and understanding towards the little one, which transforms into a strong emotional connection. Listening and reacting the right way also instills confidence in the kid. He starts believing that he can discuss whatever he thinks about the surroundings, his friends, and other aspects of life.
Such children do not fear hiding their mistakes from their parents. Listening will develop trust and unconditional love. So, even as new moms, you should be prepared to let your child speak freely, and you will see the magic happen.
4. Stop comparing yourself to other moms.
Parenting is a beautiful and unique experience; hence, it cannot be the same for everyone. You know your child best, so you should not compare yourself to other women. Discuss your motherhood journey, but if you think about how to be a good mother, you are not following the right path.
It is nice to adopt good practices but not overburden yourself just because others are doing something you are not. You know your child’s needs and follow your motherly instinct.
Friends and relatives may judge you as a mother. Still, their opinion should not affect you much if you have a healthy relationship with your child. So, set boundaries for others and work to be a better mom daily.
5. Be stern when needed.
We talked about patience, but that does not stop you from being strict. Parenting and child care evolve with the age of the child. A young child may still be easy to manage. An older child exposed to technology, environment, and friends is difficult to rear.
Thus, sometimes you may need to be stern in conveying your point and disagreement. Remember that your firm voice and language should not agitate the child extremely, as it will impact your emotional connection with him. Set up boundaries for your child and convey why drawing a line to every aspect and relation is important.
6. Be firm with discipline.
This point on being a good mother is about disciplining your child. Still, it should not be associated with punishments or harshness. You can discipline your child by teaching them the difference between right and wrong and their consequences.
If you practice discipline and point out your kid’s mistakes appropriately, he will develop the right habits over time. A very common yet crucial example here is the organization of belongings.
If you regularly and firmly ask your child to keep his things back in place, eventually, he will know that it is his job and that it must be done no matter what. This parenting style transforms the child into a responsible and well-organized family member.
7. Maintain a parallel self-focused life.
New moms usually take an off from work since, initially, the child always needs the mother. But as children grow old and can stay without you, you should consider getting back on track.
If, in any case, you do not wish to get back to work, pick up your hobby and dedicate some time to yourself. Wondering how this will help you be a good mother? You feel relaxed and happy when you spend time doing stuff you love.
If you are happy, you can focus on child care with a positive approach and be the better parent you always wanted to be. Remember that being a working mom does not make you a bad mother. If you can balance your work and motherhood well, consider it without hesitating.
8. Pay attention to your children.
Have two or more children and need advice on being a good mother? You have already experienced motherhood twice or more, so you know the mantra already. It is all about implementing the secrets equally to each of your lovely children.
It may sound like a difficult task, but it is obligatory. You should spend equal time with your children and discuss every relevant topic. Indeed, the topics will vary according to the age of your children.
It is crucial that your child does not feel neglected and should know how important he is to you and your family life. A good mother is open to discussion and should never compare siblings.
Every child is exceptional in their way, and as a mother, you should love them all equally. If you are a working mom, keep the weekends and off days for family time where you share and discuss everything.
9. Take enough care of yourself.
As a mother, you put in all your hard work and effort to develop a positive relationship with your child. On the other hand, you also strive to be a good wife. This is very stressful and may hamper your mental and physical well-being in the long run.
Thus, you deserve some care and love as well. Spend some time taking care of yourself. Physical well-being may include exercise, walking, meditation, or anything you love to do to stay healthy at all times. On the other hand, mental feel-good is pampering yourself and being happy to transform the positive energy into happy family life.
10. Be attentive
A good mother is always in alert mode. She points out her child’s mistakes and acknowledges his achievements without reluctance. Your child expects you to applaud him whenever he does the right thing, beginning in the initial phase of child development.
If you are attentive and always observe your child, you will understand that positive parenting encourages him whenever he does a good deed. This imparts confidence, and he strives to get better every time. Thus, while you are attentive to pointing out the mistakes, support the good traits to strengthen the relationship with your child.
11. Develop a sense of humour.
Humor is also a secret to how to be a good mother. Spending quality time together does not necessarily revolve around life, friends, studies, and other serious topics. Sometimes you can express your unconditional love by talking about lighter topics.
These may be about your child’s favorite TV show, cartoon character, or childhood memories. These topics may not add value to your child’s knowledge. Still, parenting experts believe that such conversations make your child feel connected to you.
Your funny childhood memories may bring a smile to his face and make him happy. It strengthens the relationship and lets the child speak his heart out.
12. Give personal space
Giving personal space to the child is a crucial point on how to be a good mother list. It is more important for older children in the family. You may think a perfect mother would know everything the child does throughout the day, but this is untrue. As the kid grows, he may ask for some time with his friends.
This is not bad if you know that he is in good company. For a healthy relationship, let your kid spend some time the way he wants and keep interacting with him regularly to guide him on the right track. Also, define healthy boundaries, which the kid should know when with the group. If your kid makes an upfront discussion about his peers, you are a great mom.
13. Encourage their hobbies and skills.
Every individual has their own skillsets and interests. Gone are the times when parents used to force children to take up activities according to their wishes. You should appreciate the skill and hobby your child wants to take up, even if it does not suit your interests. A better mom would support and encourage the child to move and work hard in the field he desires to excel.
14. Do not aim for perfection.
Children are not perfectionists. Perfection is a definition that we adults strive to achieve, and in this endeavor, we somehow hamper our relationship with our kids. As a mother, you want to give your best shot, but it is ok not to meet the expectations.
If you have a strong and loving relationship, you deserve to be called a perfect mother. Mistakes and falling short of expectations are life; motherhood is a continuous effort to achieve the best possible for your children. Therefore, enjoy this journey, stay calm, and be happy.
15. Be friendly
Be friends with your kids, especially as they grow into the teenage phase. If you point out their mistakes as a friend and share the mistakes you made in your childhood, they will feel free to share their point of view. This approach will help you guide your child correctly and keep them away from all problems.
Yes, you need to be a good role model for them, and so share the experiences you have learned in different phases of your life. Friendly parenting will help both of you understand and admire each other’s experiences.
16. Build trust
Your relationship grows strong when you are friendly yet disciplined with your kids. The child trusts you and seeks your advice in all important tasks of his life. It would help if you inspired your kids, and they should know that whenever they are in trouble, you will be there, a good friend and a great mother.
17. Show your support
A great mom is vocal about her support for her child’s needs. Usually, parents take this point for granted as they expect their child to already know that the parents will support them even if they have not communicated this.
This is not the right approach to parenting. Imagine how you would feel if your kid did not wish you on Mother’s Day as he believes you already know he loves you. So, be vocal about your support regularly and put in efforts to strengthen the bond.
18. Tell them it is ok to fail.
Positive parenting is about acknowledging mistakes and failures and then finding solutions to make way to success. No mother would want to see their child fail, but failure is an inevitable part of life. If you do not introduce your child to this aspect, they may get disappointed and disheartened.
Tell your child that it is ok if they fail in a task and that you will support him to find a solution. Hard work with perseverance is the key to success.
19. Make sweet memories for your child.
A happy childhood leads to a cheerful adult. A kid that grows up with abundant mother’s love and sweet memories spreads smiles to people around him in the later part of his life. That’s the beauty of constructive parenting. Make sure you spend a good time together and make way for a beautiful future.
20. Do not put undue pressure on them.
As a mother, you want your child to excel but do not put unnecessary pressure on them to achieve desired results. Parenting experts state there have been cases where kids could not bear the pressure from parents and took extreme life-threatening steps. It is fine to be average in one aspect of life. Keep the goals small and let them extend the boundaries gradually.
21. Split responsibilities with your co-parent
In the endeavour of being a good mother, you may take up all the responsibilities solely. But this is not the right parenting style. You should always split the responsibilities with your partner. The father is also a family member and should be equally involved in the child’s journey. Let him enjoy every moment with you and build relationships with the kids.
FAQs
Q1) How do I know I am a good mother?
If you see a happily growing and content child with lots of thoughts to share, you are a great mom. If you are raising a confident yet sympathetic kid, you are on the right path. Keep supporting your child and teach him to overcome his shortcomings through hard work. Happy parenting!
Q2) What are the top 3 responsibilities as a mother?
A good mother always wants to give her child the best. However, here are 3 top responsibilities that you should know:
- Mothers care for their children from birth to raise a physically and mentally strong individual.
- They share a loving bond with the child and support them in all phases of life.
- They teach and discipline them to become successful yet sympathetic individuals. The choice of field depends on the child’s interests and skills.
Q3) How can I be a smart and cool mother?
A smart mother sets up boundaries for her children by interacting with them and teaching them to differentiate between right and wrong. Also, simultaneously, she allows the child to enjoy life and learn lessons gradually through experiences. She is protective yet friendly, which builds trust and lets the child make the right decisions as he moves ahead.
Q4) Why is a good mother important?
Being a good mother reflects in your child’s personality. If you raise your child with the right parenting approach, he will be confident and ready to face all sorts of challenges in the future.
Q5) How can I be a mentally strong mother?
You should never be affected by how people judge you as a mother. Also, you should take out some time for yourself to relax and rejuvenate. This could be through meditation, exercise or any other hobby of your interest.
Q6) What are the hardest things about being a good mother?
As a mother, you should always be up for challenges. Your child needs you from birth until he is an adult. Parenting is a continuous process and evolves according to the child’s age. Therefore, you must observe keenly and change your approach according to the situation. Motherhood calls for lots of patience and hard work, but it is also a beautiful experience.
Conclusion
Motherhood is blissful yet difficult and strenuous. You need to try to bond and lead your children so that they trust you and share their opinions without any fear.
Now that we have revealed all the secrets of being a good mother, imbibe these and have blissful motherhood. Challenges will come and go, but as a good mother, you must be persistent and compassionate in making your child’s childhood beautiful so that they cherish these memories as they enter adulthood.
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